January 2008

yummy yummy pastels

A friend is going to help me take better pictures of my bigger pieces

Bit of a wobble over the last two days…not helped by the wonderfully deep chesty cough I developed

I have all the usual feeling daft about valuing my art drive (I like that so much I shall embolden it!) It’s easier to talk about sex drive than art drive, oooh that phrasing could be a big help! My art drive is exactly like my sex drive…Though I can say that I’ve never felt my sex drive to be daft, or even blushed about it in front of people (Not since I was 15 or so at least) but I still feel embarrased to talk about painting/drawing/writing…how nuts is that?!
And to be honest my sex drive has gotten me into scrapes I could never imagine my art drive or a painting getting me into. Though perhaps that means I’m not being brave enough in my explorations yet.
Come to mention it, I’ve a couple of nudes I keep being to shy to post!
The cough is due though, I stopped smoking a month ago (I was smoking a whole 2 – 4 cigarettes or rollies a day, but that’s still 2 – 4 too many) and my body is just spring cleaning…which is the other thing I have begun as well.
I’m not letting the de-cluttering and cleaning wipe out my focus though…it’s easy to find a lot of sensible things that need doing in priority over things the quiet little voice tells us are also important. Much like the children asking to play, I have to remember to not keep saying “later, in a little while, just when I’ve done this” those beautiful voices are gone too easily and far too soon.
So, as well as the replacement nets, toy sorting, room clearing and super vacuuming, I’ve made complete messy pages of pastels and glitter and glue…nothing other than experimenting. I’ve lined up some of my favourites to next work with and I keep letting my first journey picture float into my head…Just to allow everything to be a step in the right direction is a good feeling, I’m so often berating myself over something. For now at least everything is a step in the right direction.

The Beginning

This is my trance journey journal
In 1997 I had several visions/waking dreams which lead me on a hunt for understanding.
I began keeping this particular journal when I studied with Peter Aziz in Devon 2000 to 2001. I had already spent a year studying and healing with the gorgeous squashy Jo (or Vinod) of Shamanic Spiral (their links are under friends on the web). I have studied also with Daniel Stone and Spiritual groups in Yorkshire including with Chris Crow…and the journal is an ongoing one.

It’s been a while since I’ve had a teacher to turn to, and about three years since I have done any real journey work, readings or paintings for anyone.

Entering into this year I could feel that familiar something calling to me, and I have been softly whispering and singing in reply…unsure of the details, or even the form things would take until last night…yet I knew I was taking steps in preparation.
Since the beginning of the year I have spent every waking moment, whenever I didn’t have a child on my hands, scouring pages of internet and creating space (I think I’ve only gone to bed before 2 am only twice this month). I wasn’t sure what I was searching or making space for, except that I new it involved painting and writing.

My Myspace was the first step, and this blogger and link rolls the next. On Sunday night I finally decided I was happy and had created the best working space I could.

Yesterday I found the Katherine Skaggs site which finally had me hearing my guides shouting in my ear. The are very happy. As am I. In fact much singing and dancing and happy hugging is going on.

I have been asked to go back to the beginning.
To spend time using my bridge building sketches and develop them…they are to be my teachers for now…


Huge Gift

This evening has been such a huge gift…I love that all the things we pray/hope/wish for, can come to us in ways we never could have pictured.
I’ve learnt over the years to ask for things thoughtfully and gently, (I once had several desires manifest in one broken foot) but lately I’ve been hoping wildly, without form.
The universe is beautiful and amazing in its intricate being. Indeed.

Pete talking about the sky.

I’m so happy
I just found Katherine Skaggs, an artist in the USA that does soul paintings. I’ve done quite a few of these in the past, and had really vivid dreams about doing them for people, but in the light of day, and need to explain myself, I’ve always felt daft.
Her website is on the left.


Just after the eclipse 1999

2008 felt like a wonderful year coming in, I’d heard it was the year of wellbeing which sounded all kinds of good. Still, so far the feelings around, the little happenings and the bigger ones, are all sneaking more than a little way past expectations.

It’s a good year…possibly a rise to the challenge year.

I realised somewhen in the last couple of days that numerologically 2008 is the same as 1999, they are both 1 years, which I’m glad I made sense of (in my own merry little world) because the similarities in energy hade me intrigued.

1999 was a good year, tough and brilliant. This year we feel better prepared or moving forward and running with that 1 energy…so let’s see where it goes.

boys will be boys



noun pronounced lay-lee
1) The quality that gives a sense of pleasure, beauty and connection, to the mind or senses and is associated with such properties as moments of epiphany, excellence of artistry, truthfulness, and originality.
2) a sense of experiencing something innately true yet indeterminable about oneself, especially through external influence or environment.
3) something of (1 & 2) that has effect on several, many, or innumerable, often interlinked, levels.

Much lale is found to be hiding in the sini of the world.

It was lale as she had never come across it before…

I was filled with a sense of lale

As an adverb: she danced lale; he wrote lale

And as an adjective: It was a lale moment; the bale was so lale

Saturday Saturday

I’ve already had a lovely morning this morning…long lie-in, quick cup of tea with a new friend, baby’s asleep and the sun is shining.

And today I’m already wanting to go to the art suppliers…hmmm how to balance desire for things like paint sticks and printing inks, with the need to be sensible financially…

I want to learn and want to do.

Meanwhile, I am sort of stuck here (baby is a light sleeper) so I shall just have to drink my tea, relax a little more and meander through some of the lovely links to the left.

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