Very peaceful and relaxed for the second afternoon in a row. It’s not that everything is under control, or that I’ve achieved so much I have the right to be complacent for a while, just that finally the sense of constant pressure is wearing off.
The whole idea, when I joined Ventura, was to get a super simple part-time job that I left behind as soon as I finished my little shift…that lasted an entire three months (including five weeks training)…by that time I’d designed a complementary training session to run along with the available training program…and a week later I was transferred to training, began working on average 12 hrs overtime a week, and began dreaming about it. A year later I transferred back in anticipation of an easy life, only to be faced with challenges that set my imagination going all over again…I spent the last few months juggling several projects at a time.
Now I’m back home there are several projects I want to get more clearly off the ground, and I don’t want to run out of steam and motivation, but I am more than happy to release the sense of pressure that has me feeling chased by some demon!
If my things and ideas don’t have some of their own momentum then perhaps I oughtn’t be choosing to chase them anyway…so I’m hoping that out of this peace (ha! there are now four kids here and this is my fourth attempt to finish this!) some creative dreams will have the chance to grow.